See-Saw Effect

Once you get the pattern of life you can easily see that life has its ups and its downs, I like to call it the see-saw effect. What gets us the most is when the weight is on our side of the see-saw and we are down, I feel like these are the moments that we dwell in, these are the moments that we remember the most instead of when the weight is on the other side of the see-saw and we are at our high points. Dwelling in the weight of the world gets us no where in life, it only makes us tired and unhappy, we need to start focusing on the good and the positive moments that are happening in our life in order to keep the momentum going for the see-saw. It is inevitable to stop the hard times that come with life, I think we all know that, but it’s what we do with those hard times that count. If you haven’t noticed everyone, not just you, goes through trying times in their life, but the ones who refocus themselves during their hard times instead of dwelling in their sorrows ALWAYS get something better for themselves in the end. Casting your problems to the other side of the see-saw relieves the weight from you and allows you to focus on the things that make you happy and what’s best for you. In those moments is where your side of the see-saw will continuously rise up. There will always be trials in tribulations in life, but it’s up to us to hold on to them or not. This week I want to challenge everyone to let go of what’s holding you down, release all your problems and focus on what makes you happy, at the end of the day we all are here on this earth for a limited time, therefore you should spend most of it at your high points.

A Message to Women

Being a woman comes with so much baggage, we must carry ourselves a certain way, we must be respectful and polite because if we aren’t then we will be labeled as unpleasant or crazy. That’s our reality it comes with the territory, you must understand that. As women we set the standard, the standard for other women, children, and especially men to follow. As women we have the ability to influence the world, therefore we must be conscious of our thoughts and what we put out in the world. One of the problems with women now is that we get hurt and we use that hurt to hurt others or spread negativity because we don’t want to harbor those emotions ourselves. That’s the pattern in today's society, a man does us wrong, we go to social media to bash him and his behavior, that then brings attention from him and other males to come in and save us, but in reality, you’re attracting what you’re putting out. The negative things you said about someone that has hurt you has attracted other men to believe that they can come in a save you or make you feel better in some type of way, when in reality you should be using that energy to be nourishing yourself and fixing yourself to attract better than what you once had. As women we are emotional beings hence the reason why we harbor emotions and can feel more emotions than men. What differentiates the strong women from the weak is that the strong women have the ability to control and balance those emotions and turn them into good. It’s okay to be hurt, it’s okay to feel resentment but don’t allow these emotions to make you bitter or defeat you. Once you turn bitter or you’ve been defeated you’ll begin to devalue yourself and I think from there we all can guess what might happen. This week I want to challenge us women to try to control our emotions and really dig in deep within ourselves to figure out what it is we want in life, we are the assets without us nothing is possible, please don’t forget who you are.

Commitment

Committing should be the first step in anything you’re trying to do for yourself. Whether that be losing weight, changing your mindset, or chasing a goal. Getting your mind around commitment is harder than the actual task at hand. The problem that we face is the small voice in our heads that tells us we aren’t capable of doing it or that tells us to put it on hold. I think it’s safe to say that many of us run away from commitment because it would mean that we would have to actually stick with a task for a period of time and see whatever it is we are doing through to the finish line. Throughout that time there will be ups and downs and you will get discouraged but at the end you’ll be able to say that you committed and conquered. Once you make your mind up to actually committing to something doing it becomes like clock work, for instance; every morning most of us wake up and check our social media, that’s something we have committed to doing everyday so it became normal to us, our minds are already wired to check them so technically we don’t have to use any mental strength to tell ourselves to do so. That’s what I mean by clock work, our brains adapt to what we continuously do. If we continuously second guess ourselves we will never be able to commit to anything we try to do. We all can say we want to do something or change something about ourselves but if we can’t commit it just becomes an idea. If someone were to tell you they were going to do something several times and never follow through you would make that person out to be unreliable or a liar. We must look at ourselves in the same light, treat yourself how you want to be treated, if we make up our minds to do something for ourselves we have to follow through as well. Your word is like bond and if you cannot commit to yourself how will you be able to commit to anyone or anything else.

Accountability

The choices you make now determine your future. The choices to let go or hold on to people/things in your life also determine the situations you are placed in. If you haven’t noticed, everything you do in your life has a domino effect, many people call this good or bad “karma”, call it what you want but no matter what it's YOU that makes the choices and there will always be some sort of outcome from the choices that you’ve made. Many times we try to blame others or certain situations for why our lives aren’t right or why things aren’t going our way, but at the end of the day it’s you who made the choice to keep or get rid of certain people or things in your life, it’s you that made the choice to continue negative behavior no one else. Once we realize that it’s us that can make our lives better and become more accountable for our actions our lives will become more understandable, not easy but understandable. We will be able to see things with a clear view and be able to make better choices. The older we get the more wiser we should become, but if we continue to make the same mistakes we have no growth, so as you get older become more selective with the situations you place yourself in, be picky with who you choose to associate with because if things go wrong there is no one else to blame but yourself. This week lets try to be more accountable for the things we say and the things we do, accountability is one of the first steps in improving behavior.

For your eyes only

Every persons reality is different. Your eyes have only seen what you’ve seen, your hands have only touched what you’ve touched, and your mind only thinks what you think. Remember these facts when you feel like you have to compare yourself to someone else, your walk is different, your talk is different, therefore you can’t even compare yourself to anyone else or anyone else’s experiences. Trust that the experiences you have been through will lead you to wherever you need to go, never compare or contrast your life with someone else’s because you’ll never fully understand how they got to where they are nor will they understand how you got to where you are. When you compare you put a damper on your experiences through life to see someone else’s life through your own eyes and at that point you are living someone else’s reality, not yours. 

Frame of Mind

Live your life without bounds. There are no limits to what you can do. Whatever you put your mind to and have passion for is attainable to you, no matter what you’ve been through and no matter where you've come from.  In order to live like this it starts with your mindset, how you view yourself, and how you view others as well. A negative mind set will only bring you down, telling yourself you can’t do something is just you not supporting your own self. If you don’t support yourself there’s no way others will fully support you. You have to believe in yourself before anyone else can believe in you, you are your best spokesperson. If you notice you’re being negative about certain things in your life or you just want change in your life, change your mindset, figure out who you are, take time to figure out what you like and what you want in life, not just the surface... what you really want, where you see yourself years from now and then do something about it. You can't just sit around and wait for something to change in your life, you have to get up make things happen for yourself.  It will be challenging but it starts with finding yourself, knowing yourself, and then staying true to yourself, don’t get distracted with what's happening around you and what you see everyday, having a strong mindset will battle off any adverse thought that comes to your mind.

Self Respect

The energy you give out is the energy you receive. When others don’t show you the same respect that you’ve given them don’t fall short of yourself, stay true to who you are, allowing someone’s attitude or demeanor towards you effect who you are as a person only brings you down. If you put out  positive energy and respect others as you want to be respected, blessings come back to you ten fold. Harboring negative energy will only bring negative things into your life. With that being said be happy, be thankful, and most importantly be respectful you never know what someone is battling and each encounter with someone counts. So this week try to be respectful to others no matter your feelings or their feelings towards you, you can only control your emotions not theirs.